How Cross-Cultural Friendships Helped Me Belong

When I first moved abroad, I wasn’t chasing adventure. I was building a life from love, motherhood, and faith in something bigger than myself.

But even with all the love I carried in my heart, I found myself in a world that felt unfamiliar and quiet... Too quiet for someone who grew up surrounded by laughter, noise, and family just a door away.

What grounded me, in those first uncertain months, was the quiet kindness of my own community.

It began at the local community centre, where I was introduced to fellow Filipinos living nearby. They spoke the language of home, both literally and emotionally. We understood each other without needing to explain the longing for adobo, the sound of karaoke, or why we still smiled while carrying a thousand worries.

These first connections became my lifeline. They reminded me that I wasn’t alone in trying to make sense of a new life.

Through these gatherings, I met others, including Filipino moms, students, and workers, each with their own story of migration, sacrifice, and resilience. We shared food, laughed about cultural mishaps, shared tips and tricks, and comforted one another when the silence of a new country felt too loud.

It wasn’t until my relationship ended that I began to reconnect more deeply with myself and the community around me. I suddenly had time and space to explore not just survival, but belonging.

I started joining more gatherings, accepting invites, visiting larger cities, and meeting more Filipinos outside my immediate area. I discovered how beautifully diverse our people were, like nurses, creatives, entrepreneurs, and scholars, and how many of us were quietly rebuilding, just like I was.

And with time, I found myself reaching further beyond our Filipino community… into a world of new connections.

I began to meet Dutch friends and people from other cultures through parenting circles, language exchanges, and everyday conversations at the store or on the street.

At first, it felt awkward. Different ways of communicating. Different humour. Other views on time, parenting, and even coffee.

But then I realised that connection doesn’t always need shared culture; sometimes, it just needs shared intention.

I learned how Dutch honesty is actually a form of respect. How simple invitations like “Want to go for a walk?” often hold deeper care. And how other internationals, like me, were also carrying pieces of home while learning to build something new.

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Whether it was a Filipino potluck or a Dutch birthday gathering, I began to experience how relationships form when you open your heart, bit by bit.

Some of the best conversations came over coffee with people who had different accents, different religions, and different stories. Still, they shared a longing: to feel safe, to be understood, and to find belonging.

I used to think “home” was a location. But now I know home is built in moments where you’re allowed to be yourself.

And sometimes, that starts with familiar faces… But it grows with brave conversations, new friendships, and unexpected bridges between cultures.

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If You’re Just Starting to Open Up…

Start small. Go where it feels safe first, your own people, your own language. And when you’re ready, explore the world beyond that comfort zone. You don’t have to lose yourself to grow; you expand.

If you’re in that in-between space, I offer clarity sessions for women who are navigating migration, identity, and the quiet work of reconnecting with themselves.

👉 Book a free clarity call here

Let’s talk about your story, on your terms, in your time.